Thankful Thursday - Thanksgiving Edition!

Hello World! You knew I'd make an appearance for Thanksgiving, right? I may be sleep deprived. I may forget things.  I may even not respond to a text message for hours, or days, or ever, but I am grateful. 

My favorite stores haven't seen me in a long time.  My old haunts have probably forgotten about me by now. I can't tell you the last time my hair and face looked presentable. Most of my friends have probably given up on me by now, but I'm grateful. 

I've, somehow, acquired a little (adorable) monster who gives me a hard time daily. He sucks every ounce of energy out of my body and I couldn't tell you the last time I slept sound enough to remember my dream. This monster screams and throws a hissy fit whenever anything, other than pee, is going on in his diaper and he gets quite rude when he's hungry. But this monster greets me with laughter and a smile every morning. (After he's farted, of course. He's such a boy.) He loves to snuggle up to me when he's sleeping and he finds some peace when he is holding my hand. And for this little monster, I couldn't be any more grateful. 

His existence gives meaning to mine. His simple ways have taught me to let go of things that are complicated. I've returned to my peaceful self and let go of things in the past that were negative. I'm trying every day to not let my opinions and feelings on people or subjects influence Lennon's opinions and feelings, although we do spend quite a bit of time watching 90210 in the mornings - for these things I am also extremely grateful. 

Perhaps I am distant and missing. I suppose I have flown off of the radar a bit.  I imagine that I do seem rude because I don't really get back to anyone in a timely manner. I'm sure I seem too busy to many people but I assure you that is because I do not, under any circumstances, want to ever seem too busy for my little monster. The moments are flying by and sometimes I am not strong enough to enjoy them. I may have to watch from the sidelines but I don't want Lennon to ever have a memory of me being glued to my phone or other electronic device and appearing to not have interest in him. 

Well, on with the show!

On this wonderful Thanksgiving Thankful Thursday I find myself feeling grateful for...

The Beatles' "Let It Be" - Oh, yes, I have been grateful for and written about the Fab Four before today but the passing of time, and countless hours of sleep deprivation, have given me the wonderful opportunity to reflect on things. Now, I can tell you that out of every song in the Universe, it's this one to take to heart. Once upon a time this time of year would make me so sad. From mid-September to Christmas night I would have an unbelievable heartache. To no avail, I would listen to this song and many others as a way to soothe my soul. Now looking back as my heart has healed and I've come to terms with many sorts of relationships that have flatlined, I've realized those fools knew what they were talking about. It has taken me the better part of seven years, over 12,000 miles of traveling, failed attempts, falling in love again, and the surprise of a lifetime to realize that sometimes you simply must let things be. Put them in the corner of your heart for a while or set them on the shelf of your soul and let time take care of it. It took a while for me to get "it." Once I did, everything started to fall into place - like meeting the spider exterminator, who I would end up tricking into falling in love with me, and then this handsome, handsome baby came along.  I'm thankful for the advice that those Beatles gave to me. I have my love and I have my Pippers, and, as Kenny Chesney says, "I've never wanted nothing more." 

My New Found Ability to Fall Asleep - There was a time that it would take me hours upon hours to fall asleep. Times, they are a changin'! Now I can fall asleep nearly anywhere in any position! I've even learned how to fall asleep before I actually close my mouth and I get to wake up in a pile of drool! I am so talented that I fall asleep while Lennon is nursing and, AND, I do not fall over onto the bed or couch. Phew! If I knew being a mama would enable me to sleep like this I would have done it a lifetime ago! For real though, I suddenly can fall asleep in two minutes rather than two hours, which is great because Lennon naps, occasionally, for two hours and so do I!

My Help -  You know what's harder than being a mom? Being a single mom. What's harder than that? Being a single mom with a freakin' disability. (Sorry, if I dropped a bombshell on you!) So I have my mom, my dad, and Krissy who play the role of daddy (and sometimes mommy) on a daily basis to make up for the things that I cannot do or that Dann would be doing. It's a team and I'm incredibly grateful for that. 

My Lennon Bug -  He may be a monster and he may poop in his pants and cry when he's trying to fart but let me tell you this:  I've never ever felt luckier, more humble, or more grateful for anything in my entire life.  I am more grateful for him than I am for my own existence, than for the air that I breathe. One day things will get better.  I will get all of my strength back and I will be able to do more things for him but for now I literally get to lay around with him all day. We talk and laugh. We play and we cry. So yeah, I've pretty much dropped off the face of the earth to most of you. But I remember in the hospital, after he was born, when the doctor came in and told us that he may have a heart murmur, then it was that his skull may not be right and he may need surgery, and then the stubborn gosh darn jaundice when he had to sleep in the UV crib, which resembled a NICU bed and he had to wear an eye mask    (that's when I finally cried), and all I wanted to do is hold him or, even better, switch places with him.  I remember those few days in the hospital and the moments before I was knocked out before the surgery. I knew then I'd give my life for him, so my social life doesn't seem like a huge loss.  He's changed my whole outlook on life and the Universe. I am already trying to be a better person because of him.  I know no love like this love and I cannot be any more grateful than I am for the little boy squirming around next to me.  

Happy Thanksgiving!  

What are you thankful for? 

Thankful Thursday

I must report that thankful Thursday will be a bit sporadic in the coming weeks, months. But I am grateful every single day for many things, even though Pip's first week has been a crazy one. 

Pip is sleeping on one side of me.  He just smiled in his sleep.  Dann is on the other side and he just smiled too. 

Pip survived.  I survived.  I created a little family with an amazing man who has already showed me how fantastic he is and will be as a father, and our wonderful, perfect little snuggle butt  who loves to nap on my chest and hold my pinkie while he sleeps at night. 

I am the luckiest girl around. 

And the most grateful as well.  

Thankful Thursday

Thankful Thursday!

Trade your expectation for appreciation and the world changes instantly.  - Tony Robbins

It's been a relatively quiet week on this side of the computer screen.  I'm happy about that.  Some peace and quiet before the ball of chaos arrives to greet me head on! 

And, of course, the gratitude continues!

Bus Systems -  Dann came back from England yesterday and thankfully I finally thought to ask a friend how in the world he travels to and from NYC every day for work. My friend informed me that there is a bus that drops people off right in Scranton and he also told me how Dann can get from the airport to the correct bus station.     THANK GOODNESS! The last thing I wanted to do yesterday was to sit in bridge construction traffic for a total of 4 hours each way.   I may hate public transportation but it was a lifesaver yesterday! 

Reward Points -  I've become quite an avid coupon collector and reward point go-getter in the last few months.  Some people think I'm silly and some think I'm brilliant.   I prefer the latter. My plan is to save up points for Christmastime since our family is growing by the second - so far I have approximately $250 just saved up in points.  I'd be jealous if I were you. But that isn't the point of my story.   I had to get some sort of belt replaced on my car and I really needed windshield wipers so I thought I'd do it all at once and I had a coupon for Nissan anyway so I'd use that for the wipers and save $8.  To my dismay I could not use the coupon for the wipers BUT I did have reward points saved up, which I didn't even know about, and those points took $36 off of my bill.  Hot dog was I a happy lady!! And for the record when I typed "windshield" the first time if corrected to "sunshine."

Tums -  I am not sure if I have already shared how grateful I M for tums but they deserve it.  They're my midnight snack every night. 

Nap Time - There is just something wonderful   

about an afternoon nap.  I recommend them to everyone. 

What are you thankful for? 

Thankful Thursday!!

I feel a very unusual sensation - if it is not indigestion, I think it must be gratitude.  ~Benjamin Disraeli

Maybe that's what I've been feeling this whole time! 

I cannot help but think what a wild ride these last few years have turned out to be.  Three years ago today I left for Liverpool (for the first time).  We were stuck on the GW Bridge for a lifetime, the plane's landing gear failed the first time, and I was never so tired in my life when we finally got to the hotel in London.  It's hard to believe that all of that chaos was the starting point for Pip's arrival.  I never thought all of this would come from that.  Everything happens for a reason. Although things are quite difficult sometimes and I am in pain most times, I am quite a happy and thankful lady.  In the last few months I've learned so many things.  I've learned that, no matter what, there are people that will always show you their true colors when the going gets tough. I've learned that there are people who will let you down, but there are even more people who will come along and bring their own little candle to light the way for you (if not a candle their flash on their smartphone works). I've learned that true, honest friends are few and far between. Perhaps most importantly, I've learned that you never know what you're made of until you  are pushed right down to the nitty gritty to find out exactly how far your courage can take you, how deep your strength is, how much hardship you can endure, and how humbled and overwhelmed with gratitude you can feel once you finally persevere.  

The timing of Pip's arrival couldn't be more off. Sometimes I still find myself annoyed that my plan didn't go through the way I wanted it to, that this summer was supposed to be filled with wedding planning and odd, vintage, mismatched plate hunting instead of hunting for the best diaper deals. But then Pip moves around or kicks me and I realize that I was always the person to believe that everything happens for a reason and that it is best to realize things are out of our control as soon as possible in order to enjoy this short time we are here, why should I stop thinking this way now?  So big deal if I didn't choose Pip. He chose me, us, at this place in time.  How flattering is that?! Over 6 billion people on this planet and Pip picks Dann and I to be his parents. Oh my! Maybe my little baby is a fool, huh? 

I've always made it a point to help people whenever I could because for so long I was the one who needed so much help and because I am also one who believes that you should treat people the way you would want to be treated. However the amount of help that I've needed over the last few months is absurd and, sometimes, embarrassing.  So I must start with this week's dose of gratitude there.  

Those People Who Are in My Face All of the Time -  I do not mean this in a negative or cruel way.  There have been many times in the past that I've had to be in a friend's face to help them through something even if I was the last person they wanted to talk to, so I know what it's like to have to force a person to shut up and listen or sit down and let someone else do something.   So for Krissy, Stefanie, Donna, and Jenn - I am grateful. They consistently check up on me and, when needed, pull me back from freak out zone. There are times when I do not want to speak to anyone and they just do not shy away because I am silent. In fact, most days Krissy tells me where do go and how to get there when I start to doubt the doctors' capabilities. They're the ones who remind me that although things aren't ideal right now they could be worse and they will get better.  I'm the thankful for these girls.Every single day. 

My Baby Daddy! - I am speaking the truest words I've ever spoken when I tell people how lucky I feel that Dann and I found each other.  The odds of that happening were so slim and based on chance, as everything is but our chances were so slim it's amazing it happened.  For one, I'm so thrilled that I'm not stuck with a miserable guy.  Of course I knew this was the case way before the baby was ever a thought in my head but I just think to the boys of my past and I thank my lucky stars that Dann is Pip's daddy and not one of the yonkos from my past.  Due to stupid immigration and visa rules, Dann went to England for nine days. He comes back on Wednesday and the last few days really made me realize how helpful he is! I can be quite a monster to him, too, and he never holds it against me. I mean, sure, it could be because I would remind him that this is all of his fault, but I don't think he would hold it against me anyway. Every time I leave the ice pack downstairs in the freezer when I am already snugged up in bed I am reminded of how grateful I am for Dann. I love how he didn't change his tune when we learned I was pregnant, how he took it better than I did right from the get go. I also, now not so secretly, love how we argue over his desire to want to drop out of school to stay with the baby and I remind him that this seems like the hardest way right now but we will be happy about it in July. And I love how Dann talks to Pip and hollers at me for playing the drums on my belly because I shouldn't annoy Pip before he actually gets out of my belly.  I'm just grateful that Dann isn't a jerk.  I had such a long track record with those kind of guys.  

For Honest Friends - These types of friends are rare and when you find them, hold those friends closely. Their honesty will be one of the most valuable attributes to your friendship so pick honest and sincere ones and let go of those who cannot be honest with you. 

For Everyone Who is Sending Good Thoughts - I want to thank everyone for their well wishes, good juju, and positive thoughts that are constantly coming our way.  We appreciate it so very much and are absolutely humbled by it all. We never realized how many people care about us, does anyone? So let me say thank you to all of you this week, just in case this PipSqueak of mine decides to make an appearance before next week's TT!  

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! 

What are you thankful for?  

Thankful Thursday

There is always something to be grateful for! - Unknown 

I know it has been far too long since I have posted something on either blog and I do apologize with greatest sincerity.  There is a reason for my absence, not an excuse, it just flipping hurts to sit at the computer for a long time to type.  And having my movie theater of a laptop on my lap hurts too. As does laying on my back to type out a blog on my phone!   If you really want to know, which I am sure you do,  this blog post is being brought to you via the bathtub! 

"Blogging From the Bathtub"

Maybe that will be the name of my blog once Lennon is here because I imagine that when I do have time for a bath, it will be the only time I can actually write something! 

My mind is filled with words to say constantly, gratitude to be shared, thoughts to be thrown around but it just never gets put to paper, if you will.  Then I realized that I'm not in pain when I am in water and  I can definitely use a good soak of the bones in some Epsom salt and a warm bath since I'm swollen like a blowfish from the neck down, I figured why the heck shouldn't I use my time wisely and reach out to you guys.  You deserve it! And I think it's time to spread some gratitude!!! 

Today I am thankful for...

Bathtubs - There are some days that soaking in the tub is the only way that I find comfort. I think back to my days in Liverpool where I only had a shower to work with and I just don't know how I could have dealt with that during this last trimester. It would have been the pits!  

Krissy and Stefanie - These two gals, that  I've know for quite literally most of my life, bent over backwards to help with my Baby shower.  Stefanie made all of the favors! Did you see them? They're the cute little hand scrubs in the mason jars! Freaking adorable!   Krissy not only helped decorate and prepare (which involved too many trips to Hobby Lobby) and watching me freak out over pinwheels, but also insisted on taking care of the "prize and game" section of the shower.  I am so grateful for these girls! The two of them made this shower business a little less stressful, even though the pinwheel making definitely made up for it! 

And also I must thank Jenn for making the most adorable cupcakes for my baby shower!  Everyone absolutely loved them!! 

Everyone Else - Although it sounds like a cliché  and I'm sure that you think that I could come up with something way better than this but I must say the following:  I am absolutely 100% grateful for everyone who was able to make it to the shower and celebrate Pip's arrival, for everyone who has sent us a gift, to everyone who sends a prayer, kind thought, or good juju out to the sky to help my little guy arrive in one piece and for every piece of advice that people offer me,  I sincerely thank you!  And shower-goers and gift senders, I swear I have thank you cards signed and sealed! The delivery part is what is taking so long, I suppose it comes with the territory! :-) 

The Boppy Pillow for Pregnant Chicks - You know I was always that person that thought I wouldn't need or want to get things like the Boppy pillow. I mean how helpful can it be? Stretch mark cream? Belly bands (thank you, Donna!)? Who needs all that stuff? Just have the baby and get over it!   Let me tell you who needs that stuff!  PREGNANT CHICKS! I do not know what I would do without my Boppy pillow. At this point I can't sleep without it because it just relieves so much pressure from different areas of my body.  Lolly got it for my right after I got home and let me tell you, it is the absolute best thing ever! I don't even know how I'll part with it after Pip is here! 

Ice Packs - A sure way to get a baby butt out of your ribs is to get an ice pack on the other side of them!  I'm sure he just wants to get close to my heart and cuddle right up to it but I do not need his arse anywhere near my heart and it just hurts after a while! So I get that ice pack on there and he gets all mad and kicks up a storm when I put the cold on his badinski but the pain subsides.  He's pretty cute though!! 

Anyway...

What are you thankful for? 

Thankful Thursday - Monday Edition!

Well, doesn't time just run away from you? It was somewhat of a roller coaster of week! The lazy (busy) days of summer.  However one thing remained constant:  gratitude.

The Staff at CMC -  On Friday my friend's brother had a heart attack while, I believe, he was getting a chest x-ray (not at the hospital).  When I woke up to see her messages I was shocked to say the least. I immediately called her and the news that she gave me was less than ideal.  But my yesterday, Father's Day, he was off of the ventilator and awake so good news was had by all.  The staff at CMC pull through once again.    Of course, it's still going to be a rocky road but I am glad that he has a road!

The Beautiful Sunday - Levi's christening was yesterday and there was a huge celebration for him... outside.  When I looked at the forecast on Saturday night for Sunday I was so sad to see it was going to be nothing but rain. For a moment there yesterday it did look like the sky was just going to open and rain down on us for 40 days but, somehow, it held off for the party.  I am grateful for this.

Levi's Cooperation - You know some kids just do not enjoy being quiet or having an ocean of water over their heads. But that Honey Bee of mine took it all like a champ.  He slept through mass, can't blame  him on that one, and then when it came time for the fireworks, he wanted to dive into that water head first.  Now, either he is really smart and knew it would cool him off because it was a sauna in the church or he enjoys swimming. At let's not forget that he did his signature move of chewing the towel when the priest put it on his head. Levi's wonderful demeanor made the experience fantastic.

Cereal - I have always loved cereal and that is a fact.  But now that heartburn is a staple in my life I must say getting a snack and some milk to cure this heartburn of mine is the cat's meow. Oh, except when fruity pebbles end up down my shirt stuck to my belly.  I do not feel gratitude for that but then again I laugh every time so maybe that is something to be thankful for!

Pip's Kicks- I know I have already been grateful for his kicks but his kicks are something I am grateful for every day. He can never kick me enough! I think of it as a "Hey Ma, I'm alright. I can't wait to meet you, and stretch my super strong, abled, straight legs!"


What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday!

"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy: They are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. " Marcel Proust 

Hey there! I haven't forgotten about you lot. But I've been tired and busy and busy and tired. I had a more than a few days to notice things to be grateful for so here we go.  

Krissy - She's my faux baby daddy, we already know this.  But she's also Levi's babysitter, which comes in handy around 9 am when I need to go back to sleep!  And now that Jacob is up for the summer, she also watches him while I go to work.  She's always finding fantastic deals on baby things for me! When I am hungry at 10 pm she will go with me to eat somewhere or if I want ice cream for the billionth day in a row, she comes with me for that too.  Micka also does things for me that I just don't want to do, like go to the post office to mail invitations! Play messenger for me and, maybe most importantly, tells me to take a nap when I clearly need it!

Jessica - is my newbie sister-in-law but she's been around for years.  I am sure you know that already too.  She was kind enough to help me for hours putting together the invitations for the baby shower and also cut papers for hours for a poem I included. She's helping out with the shower planning a whole big bunch too so I am grateful for that!  Turns out she is an excellent ice cream date as well!  

Amanda - I've been grateful for her before as well.  This time around I must express gratitude for her generous donation of baby furniture - the crib! It was hard for me to find a crib a liked that looked nice and was affordable while having the fact that it was going to be significantly altered in the back of my mind.  All of the cribs I loved were like no less than $300 and the cheaper ones were exactly that, cheap! I couldn't stand the thought of getting a cheap one and hoping it didn't fall apart when we go to adapt it.  However, this crib is also too beautiful to change.  Any ideas on how to make lifting Pip from the crib easier than sawing the crib in half?   Amanda's generosity will never leave the back of my mind. :) 

Levi! - You know I do love my Honey Bee.  He's always smiling and almost always happy!  He makes my mornings and I am so happy to know him.  He's rolling over now and he doesn't stop.  So now that he is on the move I'd advise you to lock up your daughters.  He seems to love the ladies already and with his smile, phew they love him! 

Jacob - My Love Bug is such a BIG help! He loves his Levi so Jacob is always eager to help with Levi whether is to feed or coax L into rolling over. He will not change Levi's diaper though! And also Jacob helps me so much.  He will pick things up for me when I drop them because I kind of can't bend over anymore because of my back pain.  If I leave something downstairs or upstairs Jacob will go get it for me.  And he is very nice to Pip already.  I am so very lucky to have my Love Bug. 



What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday!

 

It's about that time of the week, folks.   Let's us be thankful! 

That I Had  Birthday! I'll tell you why and I don't think I mentioned this when I wanted to because I was distracted that week like woah!   For the last two or three years I make it a point to not go on Facebook on my birthday.  So from 11.59 pm May 5 to 12.01 am on May 7 I am absolutely Facebookless.  And I love it!  I actually hate FB, or at least I hate how much I use it daily.  And I"m like those people who complain about the winter but never ever move their rear-ends out of Pennsylvania, so I don't delete my Facebook either.  So that one day a year - I love life without that non-social media network.  

 I Caught an Object Today -  I am probably more thankful for this than one person should be.  I was getting out of my car to go into work.  I had a whole grocery store with me because I had to work longer than normal today.  Then I had my bag, my drink and an ice cream cone.  You can judge me if you want.  I went to pick up my bag of food and the not even half eaten ice cream cone just tumbled out of my hands!  AH!  That's what I said too.  I had catlike reflexes and caught that cone, right side up (HOW?!). And I was so very happy about that!  Thankful doesn't describe it!

I Won a Facebook Contest -  I mean I hate FB but I do try to use it wisely!  I was delighted to learn the news that I won personalized (decorated) letters for this Pip of mine! It literally made me whole entire week! Woo!

That Pip Kicks When I Sing -  He could very will hate my singing but in my head I think he kicks because he likes it! I like when he kicks because I know he's alive and all.  Grateful for that from now until the end of forever.

That Levi is a Happy Baby! - From approximately 7:03 am to 10:53 am I watch Honey Bee.  A measly four hours is nothing to complain about except for when you are the exact opposite of a morning person. Thankfully the Leve isn't really a morning person either.  He sleeps for the first hour or two once he has his bottle and then it's pretty much smooth sailing.  Makes my mornings full of sunshine everyday he does!  

What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday!

Be thankful for what you do not know. 

I've decided that since I have a minute where I am not supposed to be doing anything that I should TT.  I would like to say that I am doing it so that I know it's done this week but it's really just because while I have the minute now, I won't have the minute on Thursday.  Grey's Anatomy Season Finale is Thursday night and then I have to go to Baltimore for Pip's appointments early Friday morning which will require getting to bed early Thursday night.  As if you need a life story!  Goodness you're getting TT early be THANKFUL for that! :) 

It's been a relatively long two weeks and maybe things are starting to shape up in the background over here. I don't know but I do know it is looking better than it did last week at this time!  Woot! Woot!

So this evening I'd like to express my gratitude for... 

Things That I Do Not Understand - Maybe we aren't supposed to understand everything or know everything.  Maybe that is where people, like myself, go wrong.  I try really hard to understand others or to have a bit of knowledge about things. But then it dawned on me tonight when someone said that they didn't understand how someone can continuously act a certain way.  I responded with an "I don't know."  He repeated and I said the same and added, "Maybe we should consider ourselves lucky that we don't know." And at that moment, I was truly grateful that I am nowhere near close to understanding that particular situation. I'm not talking about Algebra (I WISH I understood that) but like things that are legit problems.  Why is this person a drama queen?  Why can't this person just kick a habit?  Why can't this person ever be thankful for what they have?  I am happy I don't think, live, or act that way and as consquence I will never understand it.  I am cool with that.  I'd also be cool if I could understand Algebra but you know... whatevs. We can't have all and I already have a whole bunch of goodness. 

That I Am (Almost) Okay with Other's Ideas and Beliefs -  I am, for the most part, cool with other religious and political views.  When it comes to politics I may think you're an idiot but I also respect the fact that you get to be an idiot. I dig other religious views.  Whatever works for you works for you and as long as you aren't hurting anyone, I am cool with it.  I am really glad that I think this way.  Meanwhile I am sort of a hypocrite because it bothers me that other people do not think the same way.  I don't think it should really matter to anyone whether I like strawberry or grape jelly or whether I pray to a God or just ask the Universe for a damn favor.  And I am also a hypocrite here because I do not enjoy that people do not or have not taken the time out of their lives to sort out the proper usages of too, to, and two; you and you're; they're, there, and their.   Next Mother's Day please do your mom a favor and sort that out. 

That Pip IS Moving Around -  I went for a Scranton check up Monday. Yes, I think they're a waste of time too but I've said many times that I'll do whatever they want me to do as long as Pip gets here safely.  Yesterday the chick was checking his heartbeat and she said, "Oh he moves around a lot!" and I agreed that that at every ultrasound he squirms around a bunch (but still won't let anyone complete the anatomy scan) but I still can't feel him move.  She was shocked. I said, "Well, what I feel doesn't feel like flutters..." and she cut me off and said, "Does it feel like gas?" I said yeah and she then told me that those feelings are actually Pipster moving around.  :) That made me happy I felt less than happy when people were all confused that I don't feel him. 

My Brother - Yes. I've been thankful for him before and I am thankful for him everyday. Yes, we can hardly tolerate each other.  Blame it on politics :).  And , yes, I love him like no other.  The truth is he drives me insane and I am sure I drive him insane.  I KNOW I do, but I am glad I have him as a brother.  Today, I learned that my abdominal muscles are torn (which explains the pain in my belly since Liverpool) and while I am happy that I know what is causing the pain, I am freaking mad as anything that it's another thing added to the list.  And as I've stated it hasn't been the shiniest week in the life of Autumn and I've been a crab apple to a small degree (I was still funny though) and Corey hasn't had the best two weeks either. So what do we do?  Well, we are both a part of the Taurus group so we acted like crab apples towards each other.  Both he and I were certainly not shiny towards each other, I can tell you that. Anywho, I ran into Corey as I came home from work tonight and we chatted for 64 seconds. As he was leaving he asked me if there was anything that I needed. I laughed and shook my head and said, "Nothing that you can help me with," as attaching my muscles to where they should be, making my back stop hurting,  etc etc going through my head.  He said, "Okay. I'll see you later.  Love you." and walked out the door.  Smiled but maybe slightly disappointed (relieved?) that there was nothing he could do.   I locked the door behind him.  And it dawned on me (I mean really, really) that if there was anyone in the world that could, Corey would go to the moon and back if it meant that I would get some relief for the next 18 weeks.  I mean I know that many people would do anything and everything to help me, but I am 100%  sure that he would do everything short of switching bodies with me to offer me some relief.  Not a lot of people have a person like that, I mean I hope you all do but I am not sure that everyone does and I am lucky to have him.   It's nice to think you have people like him around but it's even better to know that you have someone like him around. If he could make any part of this situation better, I know he would.   So for him am grateful.

What are you thankful for?

Oh and instead of the Incredible Hulk we all have the Incredible Pip! He tears through muscle wall with the strength of his 11 ounce body! Pip Smash! 

You know how I do.  Go big or go home.  

Thankful Thursday!

Gratitude isn't a tool to manipulate the Universe or God. It's a way to acknowledge our faith that everything happens for a reason even if we don't know what that reason is.  - Melody Beattie

Well this week has been quite beautiful! Even for the rainy day on Wednesday (?) it was still okay.  It was my birthday on Monday so that was delightful.  I spent the week hanging out with Levi so I surely have things to be grateful for! 

Let the gratitude continue!

I Made It Another Year! - Woooohooooo!  It's always nice to live another day, let alone a whole year! My birthday festivities were quiet this year but nice.   With so much going on in the background it's hard to try to get something together. And being that I can't get knuckled off of two drinks and listen to bad music at my favorite bar I just couldn't see another way to celebrate.  So we did a small dinner with my friends. Krissy and Lily even got some balloons and an ice cream cake for me which was uber nice!  Pip loved it cake!  If he could write, his first TT would be that he was thankful for that.  And well hopefully thankful for his mother who has been carrying him around for the last 21 weeks! So thank you to all of you who thought of me this year!

This Back Belt -  Now I don't want to jump the gun here but my physical therapist suggested to use this belt that basically puts pressure on my lower back.  I've only had it on for a few hours today (a few on and a few off)  and I already notice a difference.  I am so excited that there might be some relief I can just shout all about it.  Within a few minutes of taking it off I noticed the pain coming back. If this is the ticket for me than I am more than happy to purchase said ticket.

Pip's Nursery Set Came! - I just think it's the coolest thing that happened to me all week.  It's not together and I still have to purchase a crib to be modified but to see all of the bed stuff that he is going to use was pretty cool.   I'm excited to get it all set up for him.  He'll be pleased. The woman who sold me the set definitely helped me out with the shipping and included a present and that is always nice.  Goodness knows that I am always grateful random acts of kindness. 

Apple Slicers - I don't have a)the strength b) the patience to cut an apple up and I cannot bite into them.  The invention of apple slicers is as fantastic as the invention of electric can openers, which I will have one one day.  To whoever invented the apple slicer, thanks!

What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday!

Happy Thursday, Folks!  I suppose we are all off to a better weekend with the sunny sunny sunshine.  Even you guys in Liverpool are feeling it this week.   So if anything we can be happy about that. 

Although I am not having the greatest of weeks, or months, I can still find things to be grateful for.  This is important and I think that even when you are going through a rut or a most impossible pregnancy you must always look for the good things. So that is what I do.

This week I am thankful for...

Being Able to Brush My Teeth Like Usual -  During my first trimester I couldn't brush the back of my tongue.  I'd gag on my toothbrush and feel sick for hours.  I don't know if you know this but I am obsessed with brushing my teeth and having it taste minty fresh.  In no way do I enjoy my mouth tasting like butt.  So it dawned on me today as I was vigorously brushing the back of my tongue and not gagging that I was vigorously brushing the back of my mouth and not gagging!  I was so happy about this!  For real it was my first genuine smile of the day! So I am pretty stinkin' grateful that I can do that again and I'm also thankful that I noticed it when I was in a phunk!

The Amount of People Who Are Reaching Out to Send Their Support - I mean for real these are people that I haven't spoken to in years.  And they are calling, texting, messaging me their well wishes for Pip and I. I am grateful for it.  I appreciate every single good wish, juju, good vibe, and prayer that are sent our way. So thank you, thank you, thank you.

That People Buy Presents for Pip - It's not the fact that they are buying him things, it's not  a materialistic thing at all. I like it because when people give me things for Pip I think "oh, hey, they think he will make it too."  That might sound stupid and it's cool if you think it does but to me it's comforting. Thoughtful, of course, but the fact that they think he's going to stick around too is very, very nice to know.

Pip Gave Me Thumbs Up -  I know it's just silly nonsense and he has no idea what a thumbs up means but the Universe does! I am taking Pip's thumbs up as a sign of him telling me, "Chillax.  We got this. I'll see you in the fall."  The ultrasound tech was able to get a photo of him doing it (he did it twice) and whenever I get discouraged I look at that picture and just remind myself that every little thing is gonna be alright.

Dann's Plane Ticket is Booked! - Thank goodness!  I cannot wait to have him here.  June 26th cannot come soon enough.  At least I know when and how that is happening!


What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday!

Here we are again that moment of the week to stop and just be thankful for something, even if it seems like there is nothing possible to be thankful for.  There is always something!

Silence -  I cannot even tell you how thankful I am for the overwhelming silence that all of you gave me in the last two days.  I am sure I sound sarcastic but I am being sincere.  I hate when things go wrong or not my way, like most of you do, but what I hate even more is when I am forced to talk about it.  Although the news from Baltimore wasn't bad, it wasn't good either. I only posted when I got home because there are so many of you who care about Pip and I and want to know what is going on so I owed it to you to fill you in.  When I woke up the next morning I was ready for an overabundance of concern and maybe even "I'm sorry" here and there.  I'm just not that kind of person.  Onward and upwards is what I say!  So thank you to all of you who read (and I can't get over how many of you did) and just gave me time to process the fact that I am still a mystery.  Thank you.

Thoughtfulness of Others - One of my Beatles buddies, Linda, sent me a book this week by Anne Lamott called Operating Instructions: A Journal of My Son's First Year. I just started the book today and I am only about 40 pages in but let me tell you this book is one of the most authentic books I have ever read. It is funny, comforting, and heart wrenching already because I GET IT! But I think even if you aren't pregnant or do not have any children that it is still accessible.   I recommend it.  Thank you, Linda. Your thoughtful gift arrived just when I needed it as most things in life do! :)

A Beautiful Wedding - My brother finally tied the knot last weekend and it was a wonderful day with wonderful weather and wonderful family and friends.   Everything came together flawlessly and I am so very grateful for that!

That I Was Able to Record Pip's Heartbeat - I am naturally happy that I was able to record the sound of his heartbeat but I want to tell you about a particular instance in which I was grateful for today.  I received an email today that I would indeed have to drive back to Baltimore tomorrow (I should be sleeping!) for a 45 minute appointment due to the incompetency of *someone* not me.  To say I was annoyed was an understatement. I was on the phone complaining to my mother that I had to drive down there for the second time this week when a text came through.  I couldn't hear anything of what my mother was saying because his heartbeat was beating so loud in my ear.  I closed my eyes and listened to the sound, as I often do, and I was reminded that in the end all of these drives will be worth it.  That this is about something, someone, bigger than a 3 1/2 hour drive or just draining my bank account with gas money and co-pays, this is about a little guy who is counting on me to pull through for him. So I will go to the ends of the earth if I have to for this little baby of mine.


What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday!

Hello Wonderful Folks of CyberCity! I hope you are well.  I know I am slacking on the posting but I'll confess as to why:  It hurts my back to sit on this for too long, no matter how I sit or lay it hurts.  But I will must through it because this week I need to express gratitude.

The Brilliance of Medical Advances -  Even though they aren't that advance in the big picture.  On Monday, for the first time ever, I was able to hear Pip's heartbeat!  I couldn't get over the sound of his little heart beating so fast and strong.  He was kicking around, naturally, but I was more amazed by the sound of his heart.  The woman didn't know that I hadn't heard his heartbeat (alliteration) yet, she showed me his heart beating but then she turned the sound up (I'm a worry wart and she probably saw it on my face) and there it was!  I started to cry immediately (and I cried again the next day when I heard it). He's just so perfect already and I am so thankful I got to finally hear his heartbeat.

My Family (and Friends) Are Safe and Sound -  The ridiculous, cowardly, and unthinkable act of violence that happened in Boston terrified me.  I have friends and family up there and I am so very happy that they are safe.   A friend of mine was actually running the marathon and left twenty minutes before the explosion.  I can't even think of the luck that she has and I am so grateful for it. My heart goes out to all of those affected by the senseless act of violence.  Another note, although it isn't a act of terror or violence, it already appears to be more fatal and harmful than Boston, is the explosion in Texas.  My friend has family and in-laws in the immediate area.  So far they are safe and I would like to thank the universe in advance for it's cooperation in making sure that there aren't any more fatalities in this matter!

I'm in Pain -  I mean I am not happy I am in pain but in my mind I tell myself that I am in pain so that must mean Pip will not be in pain and is not in pain.  I'd rather be in unmeasurable amounts of pain than for Pip to feel any.  So I will take it.

The Weather is Finally Warm and Sunny! -  There is no need to explain my gratitude for this one.

Ice Packs -  They aren't that helpful in the big picture but a little relief is okay.   So for those icy packs of goodness, thank you.



What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday - Weekend Edition :)

This past week as been quite busy for me!  But it has also been filled with good news which I am grateful for. I hope that you have had a great spring break and now that we are pretty much all in sunshine, except for the scousers, I suppose we can get back in the swing of things!

This week I am thankful for...


Krissy -  I know I've been thankful for her before as I have expressed gratitude for other friends more than once but over the last two weeks Krissy has lit a fire under my butt and got things going for me, even when I am the most discouraged.   Of course I am thankful for all of my friends but Krissy is the one of the people going out of her way and then just telling me what to do or not to do.  Ha! For once she gets to tell me what to do.  She prances to appointments with me, prints papers that I need printed, or just finds phone numbers that I can't seem to find to save my life. Also because she is figuratively and literally my closest friend who has been pregnant before I can ask her all kinds of questions at all hours of the night.  And when I am freaking out that I think there is something wrong with Pip she tells me to knock it off and offers to run and get a prenatal heart monitor thingy with me.  So I must express my gratitude for her again.  Turns out I am the bigger pain out of the two of us for the next few months :)

The Optimistic Outlook My Doctor Has for Pip - Not that I don't care about my own health, of course I do, but Pip's health and quality of life is most important to me from now until the end of time.  I cannot even share how excited I am that the odds are in his favor.  I know that 1 in 400 isn't really that fantastic but it's better than 1 in 2. I am incredibly thankful for the good news that was shared with me this week.

All of the Love that Pip is Given Already -  From well wishes to belly rubs and gifts, Pip is already an international superstar! All of the good thoughts and positive vibes and prayers that are coming our way are remarkable!  Thank you.

That Kanye West Isn't My Baby Daddy -  Every time I see Kim kardashian I just want to know how the heck she got mixed in with the likes of Mr. West.  I really dislike that man.  He is up there with Nicolas Cage, Chad Kroger, and Alec Baldwin! I thank my lucky stars that Dann is Pip's Papa and not one of those creeps.

That I am Finally Able to Sleep Like a Normal Human Being -  It is so nice!  I am no longer up all night wishing I could sleep. And my mood swings have stopped (for the most part). Now if I can just work on this back pain to get lost we'd be good. :)

What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday! The Last UK Edition!

And here we are at the end of the road   The last week of TT from the UK.  Who would have ever thought that this day would come so quickly and with so many surprises along the way! 

While I've been busy packing and unpacking, donating and keeping, griping and complaining, I've also been thinking of all I should be thankful for in my life.

The Beatles -  I don't think I've ever actually expressed my gratitude for the group's existence.  But I am grateful.  If it weren't for them I would have no reason to travel to Liverpool in the first place. When I consider everything that has happened as a result of my desire to come to Liverpool because of the Beatles it sort of takes my breath way (but not in a cheesy 80's song way). So, yeah, Universe thanks for forming that little band from Liverpool.  It did me a world of difference.

My Acceptance into Liverpool Hope - My professor handpicks his students.  The year I started he accepted 14, this year 12 and if it was up to him he would only accept 7.  I actually know of one person who applied and didn't get in.  I don't know what in the heck made him pick me. We all know I am the worst student in the world but that essay I wrote was pretty stellar.  You know the saying "if you can't blind them will brilliance baffle them with bullshoot?"  I suppose that's what I did!

Dann's Father - He is kind enough to take us to the airport to pick up Lolly and then to bring us back to Liverpool to take some of my crap and then take us to the airport when I leave.   That's a lot of hassle.  However, I do have his grandkid in my belly so I guess that gives me a bit of an advantage!

The Ability to Email - Sometimes you can run up a phone bill pretty stinkin' high when you're calling doctors all of the time.   My doctor in Baltimore corresponds by email for most things and that makes things much easier than calling the office a million times trying to arrange appointments.   I'm happy that the email function of life has come into existence.

The Pilot and Co-Pilot of my Mom's Flight -  They are going to be super aware and pay 150% attention while transporting my mother from Philadelphia to Manchester.  I am quite glad for this and I'd like to thank them in advance for their complete cooperation!


What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday!

Hello there, friends.  It's that time of the week again! I hope that you have found many things to be grateful for this week.  I am in a rather good mood at the moment so let's type away! The video is from the CMAs 2009, it's Kenny Chensey featuring Dave Matthews "I'm Alive."  I don't care if you don't like country (I don care if you don't like Dave), you need to listen to it and embrace this song.  Now.

The things I am thankful for this week are...

A Few Hours Free of Pain - As I believed I mentioned last week I've been having terrible pain in my leg from my sciatic nerve. I've been dealing with it on both sides for at least ten years but lately it's been a terrible, every motion occurrence. On Sunday night at about eleven o'clock, after an absolute day of agony it just stopped hurting.  I did not even know what to do with myself!  I was afraid that any move I made would trigger it again but that didn't happen for a good 12+ hours!  I am so thankful for the little relief I had.  Of course, I'd like it to go away entirely but beggars cannot be choosers, my friends!

We Have Decided on a Girl's Name (We Think) - I know that this might be a silly reason to be thankful but to me it isn't.  In order to stop bad thoughts from crawling into my head at night, I try to picture Dann (and my mom) in the room with me when I meet the baby for the first time. However, I couldn't settle on a girl's name when I pictured a girl.  For some reason I have terrible anxiety when I pictured a girl. Given my past you'd have to understand the fears I have of creating a human that will be absolutely healthy.   When I pictured a girl (whose name didn't sit right) I just saw oxygen tubes and IVs and it just got worse.  But then this name came to my head and there wasn't any of that nonsense going through my head.  So I am incredibly thankful that I found some peace there.

That the Second Trimester Fairy Will Arrive Promptly  in Three Hours -  This is just a thank you in advance for her cooperation :)

The Good Day that Dann and I Had on Tuesday  -  As some of you may know I haven't been feeling the best in the last few weeks and Tuesday was an okay day.  There was sunny sunny sunshine all day.  Dann and I went to town and pranced about looking at baby clothes etc.  We used our points earned in the last year to go to the movies for free (Wreck-It Ralph) and it was just n-i-c-e. He's a good guy :-)

I Slept for Ten Hours Straight at a Normal Time -  OhMyLanta!  How excited was I to fall asleep at 12:30 and wake up at 10:14?!  I didn't even know what to do with myself! The daylight and the sunshine!  Woot!  I mean, it hasn't happened since but whateves. :)  You take what you can get, know what I mean?

An extra special TT-

     Today is my "little" sister's birthday!  I am very thankful that she has had a healthy and happy (albeit full of surprises) year!  Happy Birthday, Christa!





What are you thankful for?




Listen to that song!

Thankful Thursday!

Hello world! I am sorry for the skipping of the TT last week but truth be told it wasn't a good week.  Not that I didn't have things to be thankful for but I just didn't want to pester you with my misery.  This week has been a bit better, minus the 24 hour headache that has finally stopped. Nevertheless, life goes on and so must

 the gratitude.

This week's winners are...

Food From Home - I can tell you that I do not have an appetite for anything over here but the second I think of DeeJay's pizza or soup from Fratelli's my mouth starts to water.  I hope that my appetite is out of this world when I go home and that the thought of food in my mouth no longer turns my stomach.  And stuffing! OMG, stuffing!

My Sense of Humor -  If you can't laugh at yourself then you are in pretty rough shape for really tough times.   This isn't even a really tough time in the grand scheme of things, I know.  But right now, it is really difficult and complex.  As soon as one thing stops to hurt another thing starts. (STOPS TO HURT?  WHAT??!)   As soon as one thing stops hurting another thing starts.   I mean I laugh at myself all of the time but when my sciatic nerve began to bother me on both sides, I just lost it.  Of course this kid of mine would aggravate the biggest nerve in the body. By the way, Pip is only the size of a quarter! How could something so small cause so much chaos?! I think he/she will be the first baby grounded from the get go :)

Daily Deals from the Scranton Times - Or other companies like that.   A few weeks ago Fratelli's was on offer.  So it's like you pay $10 for a $20 gift certificate to Fratelli's.  My brother got me some and I cannot wait to gobble that up.

Gingerbread Men -  So it is true, ginger does help an upset belly.  Mint has failed me and a whole bunch of other things as given no relief but Dann found cute little bite-sized gingerbread men that hit the spot.  Yep, I keep them on the side of my bed and much on them during the night. The funny part is that I hate ginger.  I think it burns my tongue.  Well, now ginger and I are best friends.     Ha. I had a dog named Ginger.  She was my best friend!

Apple Care -  So Dann and I have this habit of kicking each other's laptops off of the bed. I've learned to not leave mine on the bed and until last week Dann liked to put his laptop wherever my feet were.  Late last Wednesday night it just went sailing off of the bed.  Since it happens all of the time we didn't really think anything of it.  He picked up his laptop about 45 minutes after the incident and the screen wouldn't turn on.  It was terrible.  As if either one of us have the money replace anything on a mac. I cried my little eyes out. He did buy the three year warranty but when I asked him when he got it he wasn't sure and it made me cry harder. There wasn't an appointment at the Genius Bar for a week so I had to wait a whole week in hopes that they would be able to fix it.     And they were able to fix it for free!!  Oh thank goodness!  It would have cost us 450 POUNDS to fix that.  If you convert that to dollars, I could buy a whole new laptop and a half.  I'm a good shopper. :)


What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday ( Insomnia Edition)

Be thankful for all that you have, because you never know what will happen next. - Unknown (and I cannot Google it right now)

So here we are at the end (beginning) of another week. I'd like to tell you that it has been a fantastic week but it has not been and I cannot lie. Nevertheless, we must be grateful for this IS life.

(Ugh! I just realized no boldface this week because I'm blogging from my phone!)

This week I am thankful for...

My Friend Not Having Cancer - Almost two weeks ago my friend sent me a message saying that she had some problems with her lady parts and her doctor was concerned that it might be cancer. I'm very grateful that cancer it is not and her problems will be wrapped up momentarily!

Subway Restaurant - There are some days that I have no appetite at all and then I think of theeeeee delectable ranch dressing that subway offers me and I want to eat! You'd swear their food is made of gold if you could see how fast I devour it! I suppose gold isn't the best thing say because I have no interest in gold.


Donna - I've known Donna since middle school and I'm her son's godmother. This week was her bday and she was kind enough to run to Target for me to pick up an über sale of "Hotel Transylvania" for me. I'm very happy about this because I hate missing sales and I hate paying a trillion dollars for movies!

Jacob Still Wanted Me To Be His Valentine - I couldn't be happier about this. Although he is not too thrilled on Pip's arrival he did tell me that he will protect Pip (if Pip is a girl, if Pip is a boy then Jake's going to wrestle with Pip when Pip's five). He agreed that he would be my big helper over the summer, as long as he can still get DS games. So it appears that he and I both need time to get used to Pip's arrival. However... when I asked him, anxiously, who his valentine was he smiled and said it was me (and his mom but whateves)! Goodness, at least I didn't lose that spot!

My Valentine, Daniel - So he's a big help these days. I mean he usually always is but the last three weeks it's been Dann that has been doing everything from cooking and cleaning to rubbing my feet. I mean in all reality he should be doing something while I'm growing a human that is half him but I must say that I am pretty lucky to have this guy. Even when I'm a grumpy bear and being unacceptably mean (it happens, folks), he is patient and doesn't hold it against me at the end of the day when I am putting on the charm asking him to tickle my back. I'm sure there are many ladies out there who have a much harder time than I do and do not have someone like Dann. He was so stinkin' cute on VDay, and sneaky as well, which was much appreciated because it was nice to not think, "OH MY GOD! THERE'S A HUMAN GROWING INSIDE OF ME!" While I handle other obstacles with grace and humor, Pip is getting the best of me. I'm happy to know that Dann is here to catch me if I fall, joke around when I'm sad and make me food at four in the morning because my body goes through energy like Taylor Swift goes through boyfriends. So looking on the bright side, I find myself grateful that I'm not having a baby with some bloke who'd rather be at the bar meeting new ladies instead of doing all he can to help. Or just staying clear of this lady who reminds him every second that everything is his fault because he's the reason she's pregnant in the first place. Yeah, I'd be at the bar if I was him or you know trying to throw myself in prison. :)

So, dear friends, what are you thankful for?


Sorry about the lack of formatting. I am blogging from my phone in my bed wishing that I could just sleeeeeep.

We Now Return to Your Regular Scheduled Programming... Thankful Thursday!

It's that time again!  I hope that some of you think of things to be grateful for while waiting for my post to pop  up on your News Feed or emails or however you are notified.  So it's been a crazy week, huh? Let's let the gratitude continue...

Stefanie, Krissy and Jenn -  These three have been running all over the creation in order to pick up medicines and other things to send out to me that just aren't in England.  I appreciate their kindness more than they'll ever know.

Jasmine and Danny -  Jasmine is one of my best friends here and Danny is her other half.  Quite a comical team in normal circumstances but as of late their generosity, thoughtfulness and time are so very abundant I cannot express enough gratitude for them.

Froot Loops - Yeah, I know, I'm not supposed to have them. However, when that is the only thing that I can keep down while also giving me strength for three hours, my doctor didn't argue. I am glad that they exist and I am sad to have run out of them.  Today was a bad day and I blame it on my lack of Froot Loops.

My Mom - Yes, I also know I have been grateful for her more times than I can count but it is true.  And another thing I've learned is that when you have unexpected surprises given to you in life and they turn your life upside down, it will be your mother that picks your behind off of the floor, dusts you off, and remind you that things will be okay even if it is from 3,500 miles away.  She is the one that I can be so honest with and she won't come back with a response that will scare me to smithereens. She tells me what I can and cannot eat when I am unsure (I don't know, I think that everything is bad for me right now). She also reminds me, constantly, that there are more than enough hands to help me out once Pip arrives, which is the most comforting thing for me to hear.  Pip and I will be okay and we cannot wait to see Mimi on March 16 when she graces Liverpool with her presences, even if it is just to bring her knocked up daughter back to the States! ;)

That I Am Not a Teenager -  Not to knock any previous or current teen moms out there but I remind myself constantly that this unexpected situation could be worse, I could be 14 and unemployed with a baby on the way.  (Did you see the 9 yr old that just gave birth in Mexico?) Instead, I am 28 and only sort of  unemployed with two masters degrees and a wealth of life experiences that will aide in raising this human that is on its way. In most women's lives this is a wonderful time to have a baby!  I just have to remind myself of that when the fear knocks me off my tukus.


What are you thankful for?

We Interrupt Your Regular Programming For This Very Important Announcement

“It doesn't take much to surprise others, but to surprise oneself- now that is a great feat.” ― Kristen Hartley


So in last week's TT I shared that Dann and I might move the wedding up six weeks from October to August 2014 because we don't love the idea of paying $95 per heater. This made many people believe I was pregnant. I don't know why because there would be no point in moving a wedding up six weeks if I was pregnant now.  But we are just considering moving the wedding up to cut a few hundred off of the cost of the wedding.  But...

I am pregnant. 

Yes.  It's a shock and a surprise.  I was late and I thought my body was just dealing with the stress and exhaustion from traveling and  being home for the holidays - Honey Bee's arrival and my best friend's mom dying took it's toll on me and I think everyone could see that when they looked at me.   So when I told Dann to get a test when he was getting dinner on a Monday night, it was just to calm my nerves because there was no way I could be knocked up since I was on the pill.  I had a pain in my stomach all day so I thought it was my appendix more than I ever imagined it being a baby.  By the time Dann got home I already had it in my head that I was going to tell him it was positive.  I'm cruel and I love jokes and Dann's shocked face is probably the best thing I've ever seen.  So, you know, I went into the bathroom with a smirk because this was going to be the funniest thing I've done all week. 

Sometimes, folks, the joke ends up being on yourself. As I was waiting for the result to pop up "Not Pregnant,"  I was reading all of the idiotic questions that came in the instructions.  I was talking to myself making fun of it as I looked down and saw "PREGNANT 3+!"   WHAT THE HECK?! 

I shouted or gasped or something so dramatic that I would annoy myself I saw it on playback. Life does not come with that function.  I went out to Dann.  I couldn't even speak and he said, "You're pregnant?"  and I sobbed.  I sobbed for the next five days because this was not a part of my plan.  I immediately called my sister.  I went to the hospital to get this appendix pain checked out.  They confirmed I was pregnant.  As if the two at home tests didn't confirm it enough.  

My world was up in the air and I was 3,500 miles away from my home, my doctors, and my mom. Yes, I wanted my mom and that is okay. 

So I called my doctor.  Could I even carry a baby? Did I even want to?  Would it be too risky? A simple Monday night, joke gone wrong, turned my whole life upside down.  And I had no control over it.  I love control. I loathe chaos.  We had plans.  We wanted to start our careers, travel, be free for a little while.  But the nurse at the Women's Hospital told me that some things are meant to be.  Really, lady?  Do you really think I want to hear about your philosophy on why unexpected fiascoes arise?  Sorry, friends, sarcasm and humor is how I deal with stress. 

I was terrified.  I still am terrified.  It's a human being.  I am hardly responsible enough to take care of myself, not to mention I'm lazy, impatient, stubborn, and the freest spirit you'll ever know.  I am the one who is "living the dream."  So I think it's okay to be terrified.  I am going to have a constant sidekick along with my part-time sidekick, Jacob.  Wowza!

I confided in friends while waiting to put the words right to the doctor.  Maybe not right but to say it in a manner that wasn't hysterical.  Hysterics is what I was in.  Slowly but surely, I am calming down and beginning to get happy about this. Just think, I have someone totally new to annoy for the rest of its life! On top of that, I have something to hold over Dann's head for the rest of my life.   

So the doctor believes that this baby, Pip, and I will be okay to continue with this pregnancy. 

We will go to Hopkins for a C-Section and I imagine a few hundred times before the baby gets here. 

It won't be easy (surprise, surprise) but I trust that the Universe wouldn't steer me too wrong too many times.  Who knows maybe this Pip of mine will change the world?  It certainly has already changed mine.  I've never known someone to stop me in my tracks until this kid.    

...Of course, I wouldn't rest with saying I'm stopping in my tracks.  I'd be comfortable with yielding though. 

I hope that I am half as good as a mother as my mom is and maybe half as good of an aunt as I am!  My mother is amazing and, let's face it, I am a kickass aunt.  :) 

By this point, I'll have to announce it on Facebook.  I am the only one who hasn't and I'm the mama.  So I hope that all of my family has heard the news from another source than the anti-social networking site.  If you didn't I apologize. I tried my very hardest to let everyone know before it was on Facebook.  News travels fast in a small world.  

Oh... please, if you will, send good juju and positive vibes our way. 

Thankful Thursday!

It's that time of the week again, folks!  I hope that you had a wonderful week.  I cannot believe that January is pretty much over.  What a difference a month makes, aye?  Soon we will be on to warmer weather, which for NEPA, I hope that is very soon! 

This week I am thankful for 

Music -  I know I've been thankful for music before but I honestly don't know of anything else that can be more soothing to the soul than music. I admit I am a music snob so I think there are only certain artists that can really do it for you but if JLS or The Wanted do it for you, that's fine. It's all about the semiotics people. Ha! My graduation ceremony is tomorrow :) 

My Support System -  This week has been a hard week.  I won't bore you with the details but I must express my gratitude for Esmee, Jasmine, Christa, Stefanie, Shani, and Dann.  They are my people.  They are my rocks.  This week would be unbearable without them. 

Ovens -  Since my flat is less than stellar and I have mentioned how awful my heating is I am very thankful for our broken electric oven.  Dann and I plop our butts in the living room/kitchen all day in hopes that the oven will heat up the whole room.  It doesn't but it is the warmest room in the flat.  For reals, it's so cold that I can see my breath in the bathroom!

The Unsubscribe Link -  I have recently realized that my email address is the one I have been using since 1998.  I am creature of habit who doesn't really love change.  Having this email address since my mid-teens has enabled thousands and thousands of spammers to send me messages daily.   So I try every, or every other, day to unsubscribe myself from a few of those senders a day. My favorite ones are the ones that tell me I have 500K USD to claim and the ones telling me to find a great dentist in Scranton.  Obviously these spammers don't know me at all.  I am trying to start getting rid of the junk in my life, starting with emails. 

The Liberty of Changing My Mind -  Honestly, you never know how handy it is until you are in a situation where you really have to change your mind for the best result. Whether the issue is big or small it's nice to know we can change it.  Looking like the wedding will be moved up a few weeks.


What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday!

Didn't I say the weeks fly by when we look at it from a Thankful Thursday POV?  Of course it doesn't help that I was super late in getting last week's post up but whateves.

So this week I am thankful for...

Thankful Thursday! - Some weeks, it's the only way I can keep track of what day of the week it is. I need some order in my life!

My Old Landlord - Honestly, I hate living where I am currently living.  The internet is crappy.  The heat is finally working (after months of not) and there is no privacy. I kid you not, the workers and the landlords come through here whenever they want to.  In fact the other night, Dann and I were up watching house in the living room, and my landlord walks in!  AT MIDNIGHT!  My old landlord didn't even bother us at all!  Sometimes to a fault but jeeze Louise at least they left us alone!

Everyone's Advice - As we all know by now, Dann and I are tying the knot and I cannot really express how thankful I am for everyone's suggestions. Our wedding is under pretty unique circumstances and I really love everyone's advice in regards to making this as comfortable as possible for the guests and the bride.

Justice of the Peace - It's very nice to know that if all of these wedding plans get out of whack we can always get hitched in downtown Scranton!

What are you thankful for??

Thankful Thursday!

You know I really think that TT seems to make the year go by much faster than it really does.  Every time I turn around I realize it's Thursday (Saturday or Sunday or Monday [oops!])!  Maybe it's only me but I find it amazing that we are sort of in the middle of January and we barely sneezed into the new year.
But the gratitude continues!

We Have a Venue!  -  Well I am very excited and grateful that one of my friend's aunts is willing to let Dann & I use her barn for our nuptials.  This is fantastic because I am already aggravated with planning this event!  I will not  be surprised if we end up in the courthouse! But right now we have a spot to be married and a date!  And, lucky me, I even have a groom.

Board Games - For reals,  I love playing games.  I bug Dann all the time to play games on the iPad.  He usually cries when he loses but I don't really care because I love to win.  I did get my butt handed to me this weekend but that is because I was playing nice. That won't happen again :)

Daniel J. McLaughlin -  He's Dann's best friend and best man.  I'm grateful for Danny because he is an excellent friend to Dann and also he keeps Dann & I in check, which is not something that many people can do. And he was sort of the worst player at Monopoly :)

Rides To and From Airports -  I must say it is quite a pain to be driving to and from airports just to pick someone up or drop someone off.  It is even worse when the airport is a distance away.  Thankfully our parents do not mind picking up our behinds from the airports and then taking us back when we decide that we are bored with a country.

The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time - If you don't know this by now, then I should tell you:  I love video games.  I am two sleepless gamed nights away from being deemed a video game nerd and that is okay with me.  I don't know if you're lucky enough to have played this game on the N64 then you know how incredibly excited I am to have this for the DS.  It keeps the boring days here less boring.


What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursday!

Without darkness, there can be no light.

Hello wonderful friends. I cannot lie and pretend that this will be a happy post. I will try to find something pleasant to write about but no promises.  On New Year's Eve a very best friend of mine lost her mother after a brief sickness. To be blunt - this sucks. However, I think it is important to express gratitude especially at a time like this so here we go...

Straightforwardness, Compassion, and Empathy - The doctors and nurses at CMC were outstanding for Krissy and her family. For a good five days they gave it their all and also kept Krissy's family updated even if the news wasn't good.  The direct questions that Krissy asked were answered honestly instead of giving her false hope. I sat in the waiting room with Krissy the last day that her mom was alive and the nurses that came out had a great amount of compassion and empathy in their eyes.  The nurses, that I saw, were close to our age, their moms probably were older but I think when you are anywhere near someone who loses someone, in this case a mom, you cannot help but feel for them.  I am sure that the staff in the I.C.U. are not strangers to death but after days of trying to save this lady, I saw sadness in their eyes when they came to tell Krissy's family that this was it, the battle had been lost.  Although I love him, I am glad the doctors and nurses weren't all Dr. House about it. Tough news is tough either way but delivered in a kind manner makes the burden a bit easier to bare.

Bad Days - This has been a crazy month and the last few days have left me exhausted. Unfortunately, when I am tired like this it isn't a normal grumpy, sleepy tired. It's a craptastic day filled with weak muscles and how-the-fork-am-I-going-to-get-from-one-seat-to-another-seat tired. Those days are quite...  craptastic. But I am sort of grateful for them as they remind me that I can look forward to a better day.  I know it won't be the next day or even the day after that; I also know that in four or five days I'll be feeling okay again.

Sleep - I skipped out on TT last night because, as I said earlier, I am exhausted.  I went to bed far before Dann and I have no idea of when he actually came into bed so that means I was out cold. It is a rare occasion that I am asleep before 12 and I think that might have been the case last night. My last text was from Krissy and my phone just tells me it was from yesterday.  Didn't even know that I got it so I was definitely fast asleep.  I so desperately needed and I am grateful for the whole nine hours I was in Dream Land. 

Dinner Dates With Friends - You know it's just fun to laugh, a wholehearted, spit your food out of your mouth, watch your friend choke on coffee laugh.  This usually happens when my friends go out to eat and I love it.  It probably the thing I miss the most when I am in Liverpool.    
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What are you thankful for?